LAWS OF THE NATURAL UNIVERSE

Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch oryou'll have to pee.
Law of the Workshop:Any tool, when dropped, will rollto the least accessible corner.

Law of Probability:The probability of being watched isdirectly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of the Telephone:If you dial a wrong number,you never get a busy signal.

Law of the Alibi:If you tell the boss you were late for workbecause you had a flat tire, thevery next morning you will have a flat tire.

Variation Law:If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one youwere in will start to move faster than the one youare in now (works every time).

Law of the Bath :When the body is fully immersed in water,the telephone rings.
Law of Close Encounters:The probability of meeting someone you knowincreases when you are with someoneyou don't want to be seen with.

Law of the Result:When you try to prove to someonethat a machine won't work, it will.

Law of the yard sale:When trying to prove to someone thatthe item you're selling will work, it won't.

Law of Biomechanics:The severity of the itch isinversely proportional to the reach.

Law of the Theatre:At any event, the people whose seatsare furthest from the aisle arrive last.

Law of Coffee:As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee,your boss will ask you to do somethingwhich will last until the coffee is cold.

Murphy's Law of Lockers:If there are only two people in a locker room,they will have adjacent lockers

Law of Rugs/Carpets:The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landingface down on a floor covering are directlycorrelated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.

Law of Location:No matter where you go, there you are.

Law of the Logical Argument:Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

Brown's Law:If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
Oliver's Law:A closed mouth gathers no feet.
and last but not least

The Law of Wal-Mart:As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop carrying it.